Therapy can provide several key benefits for children. Providing them with a safe and supportive environment to express their thoughts and emotions. As children navigate the challenges of growing up, such as academic pressure, social dynamics, family changes, or traumatic experiences, therapy can help them develop healthy coping skills, improve their emotional regulation, and build resiliency.
Early intervention through mental health support not only addresses immediate concerns but also lays the foundation for long-term emotional well-being and personal growth. By providing the tools and space for open communication and self-awareness, therapy empowers children to better understand themselves and the world around them. Therapy for children and parental support in tandem can be an incredibly helpful tool for children to tolerate distress and develop healthy mechanisms to cope with tough or intense emotions.
Understanding Childhood Emotional Challenges
Children, like adults, experience a broad range of emotions. These include sadness, anger, anxiety, fear, and frustration. However, due to their developing brains and limited life experience, they often lack the tools to understand or manage these emotions in a constructive way. Common sources of emotional distress in children include family changes (such as divorce or death), school-related pressure, social conflicts, bullying, trauma, or mental health conditions like anxiety disorders or depression. When unaddressed, these emotional struggles can show themselves as behavioral problems, academic difficulties, social withdrawal, or other symptoms such as headaches or stomachaches.
Many children are also raised in environments where emotional expression is discouraged or misunderstood. In such cases, children may learn to suppress their feelings, leading to internalized distress that can carry over into adolescence and adulthood. Therapy provides a structured and supportive environment where children can explore and process their emotions safely and constructively.
The Role of Therapy in Children’s Emotional Development
Therapy for children can take various forms depending on the child’s age, developmental level, and specific needs. Some therapeutic approaches could be play therapy, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, where the child learns coping skills and strategies, or CBT therapy, where the child talks and processes their thoughts and feelings with their therapist. With all of these approaches, the goals remain the same, which are to help children understand their emotions, develop problem-solving skills, build resiliency, and learn how to express themselves in healthy ways.
The Importance of Distress Tolerance Skills for Kids and Their Mental Health
Children today can face high levels of stress and emotional challenges. From academic pressures to social dynamics, and even the impact of global events, children are constantly being tested. Helping children develop the tools that they need to navigate emotional distress is crucial to their overall development. Distress tolerance skills can help children endure and manage overwhelming emotions without becoming reactive or resorting to harmful behaviors.
What Are Distress Tolerance Skills?
Distress tolerance skills are techniques that help individuals, especially children, handle intense emotions in healthy, constructive ways. These skills are not about avoiding or suppressing emotions, but rather learning how to accept them, ride them out, and respond mindfully. Distress tolerance skills are a core component of DBT, but they can be beneficial for all children, whether or not they have a diagnosed mental health condition.
Examples of distress tolerance skills include:
- Deep breathing or mindfulness exercises
- Distraction techniques (e.g., engaging in a hobby or physical activity)
- Self-soothing strategies (e.g., listening to calming music, taking a warm bath)
- Using positive self-talk
- Practicing acceptance and radical acceptance (acknowledging reality without judgment)
Click here to view some of the DBT Distress Tolerance skills
Why Are These Skills Important for Kids?
- Building Emotional Resilience: Children who learn distress tolerance skills become more emotionally resilient. They are better able to face challenges, setbacks, and disappointments without becoming overwhelmed. Instead of shutting down or acting out, they learn to process their emotions and bounce back. Young children may lack the vocabulary to express how they feel, often resulting in outbursts, tantrums, or withdrawal. Therapists help children expand their emotional vocabulary and teach them to identify their feelings in a nonjudgmental space. For example, a child may learn the difference between feeling “frustrated” and “angry,” which allows for greater self-awareness and self-regulation. Therapy helps kids better understand themselves and why they feel or act a certain way.
- Improving Academic and Social Performance: Emotional regulation is closely tied to success in school and relationships. Kids who can manage stress and frustration are more likely to concentrate in class, solve problems effectively, and communicate well with peers and adults.
- Encouraging Independence: When children learn how to handle difficult emotions on their own, they gain confidence in their ability to navigate life’s ups and downs. This sense of independence helps them feel more in control of their lives. Therapy can help children develop emotional intelligence, which can lead to a stronger sense of self. This stronger sense of self can help children develop a higher level of confidence and a positive self-image. Children gain the emotional tools that they need to support them towards long-term resiliency that will take them well into adulthood.
- Fostering Healthy Long-Term Habits: The coping skills children learn in early life often shape their adult responses to stress. Instilling distress tolerance early lays the groundwork for emotional wellness and healthy decision-making throughout life.
- Family Dynamics: Therapists who work with children often work with parents and guardians too. By working in tandem with your child’s support systems, it helps not only the adults to better understand the child’s needs, but it also helps the adult supports to reinforce the skills at home. Working collectively as a team helps to increase the level of support for the entire family, and it helps each member of the family to grow emotionally. As a result, therapy can reduce tension and improve the overall emotional climate at home.
- Creating a Safe Space: Therapy provides a confidential and safe environment where your child can feel heard and validated. This is very important for children who might not feel safe expressing themselves at home or in school. The therapeutic trust and rapport between the child and child therapist are critical in helping the child open up, explore difficult emotions, and receive guidance without fear of judgment or punishment. By having a safe space to communicate, children gain tools for building and maintaining healthy relationships with family, friends, and teachers. Through having these safe adults, children learn how to express themselves clearly and appropriately.
Teaching Distress Tolerance
A critical component of therapy is teaching children how to tolerate distress rather than avoid or suppress it. Distress tolerance is the ability to endure emotional discomfort without becoming overwhelmed or engaging in harmful behaviors. In therapy, children learn that all emotions—even painful ones—are temporary and manageable.
Skills taught may include:
- Mindfulness: Encouraging present-moment awareness and acceptance of feelings without judgment.
- Emotion Regulation: Helping children recognize emotional triggers and practice calming techniques.
- Problem-Solving: Guiding children in evaluating situations and choosing constructive responses.
- Delayed Gratification: Teaching children to sit with discomfort rather than seeking immediate relief.
These skills are particularly useful when children encounter setbacks or disappointments, such as failing a test, losing a friend, or facing peer rejection. Instead of reacting impulsively or shutting down, children learn to pause, reflect, and choose a healthy response.
Real-World Applications: Therapy in School and Home Environments
The benefits of therapy extend beyond the therapy room and into a child’s everyday life. In school settings, children who have undergone therapy often show improved concentration, better peer relationships, and reduced behavioral issues. They are better equipped to handle academic pressure, conflict, and transitions.
At home, therapy can also improve family dynamics. Many therapists include parent training or family therapy sessions to ensure consistency in emotional support. Parents learn how to validate their child’s feelings, set healthy boundaries, and model coping skills themselves. This holistic approach reinforces the therapeutic work and creates an emotionally supportive environment for the child to thrive.
Types of Therapy That Can Help Teach Distress Tolerance and Coping Skills
Different therapeutic modalities offer unique benefits in helping children cope with emotional distress. Some of the most commonly used approaches include:
1. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
CBT is one of the most evidence-based approaches for helping children manage negative thoughts and behaviors. CBT helps children recognize the connection between their thoughts, feelings, and actions. For example, a child with anxiety may learn to challenge irrational thoughts (“I will fail the test”) and replace them with more balanced ones (“I studied hard and will do my best”). CBT provides concrete tools for managing stress, reducing anxiety, and responding to distressing situations with greater resilience.
2. Play Therapy
Play therapy can be especially effective for younger children. Play therapy uses toys, games, and creative expression as a bridge to help with communication. Since children often communicate through play rather than words, so therapists can observe patterns, identify concerns, and help children process experiences symbolically. Through guided play, children can re-enact scenarios that cause them distress and practice alternative outcomes, promoting healing and empowerment.
3. Art and Music Therapy
Creative therapies offer children another outlet for expressing feelings that might be difficult to verbalize. Art therapy allows children to use drawing, painting, or sculpting to externalize their inner experiences. Music therapy can help children explore emotions through rhythm, lyrics, and sound. Art and music therapy can be especially helpful for children who have experienced trauma or are nonverbal.
4. Trauma-Focused Therapy
Children who have experienced trauma often struggle with emotional regulation and a heightened stress response. Therapies such as Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (TF-CBT) or Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) can help children process traumatic memories, reduce symptoms of PTSD, and build coping strategies for the future.
5. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is well-known for its effectiveness in helping people manage intense emotions, and one of its core components is distress tolerance. DBT teaches distress tolerance skills in a really structured and practical way. Children learn radical acceptance, how to self-soothe, improve the moment, distraction strategies, and regulate their emotions by activating their body’s parasympathetic nervous system through the TIPP skill.
Click here to view all of the DBT skill modules
Long-Term Benefits of Therapy for Children
The coping skills children learn in therapy don’t just serve them during childhood, they also lay the foundation for lifelong emotional health. Children who learn to identify, express, and regulate their emotions grow into adults who are more self-aware, empathetic, and resilient. They are less likely to engage in self-destructive behaviors and more likely to seek help when needed.
Early intervention through therapy can reduce the risk of developing chronic mental health issues in adulthood. Research consistently shows that early support for emotional and behavioral challenges results in better long-term outcomes in mental health, relationships, education, and employment.
Addressing Stigma and Increasing Access
Despite the proven benefits of therapy, many children don’t receive the help they need due to stigma, lack of access, or financial barriers. Stigma around mental health can prevent parents from seeking therapy for their children, fearing judgment or believing that emotional struggles are a sign of weakness. Schools, healthcare providers, and communities play a vital role in normalizing mental health care and promoting early intervention.
Increasing access to therapy also requires systemic changes, including expanding insurance coverage, integrating mental health services into schools, and investing in training for child mental health professionals. Every child should have the opportunity to develop the tools they need to manage their emotions and lead fulfilling lives.
Therapy for children at DBT of South Jersey offers many benefits for children and their families that go beyond emotional and behavioral challenges. Therapy empowers children with the ability to understand and regulate their emotions, tolerate distress, and respond to life’s challenges with resilience and self-compassion. There are a variety of therapeutic modalities that help children learn practical strategies that nurture emotional intelligence, improve relationships, and enhance overall well-being. It’s all about finding the right fit for you and your child. By learning and applying these skills early in life, therapy not only alleviates current distress but also equips children with a toolkit for lifelong mental and emotional health.
Mental health resources:
- National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: Call 1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255).
- NAMI National’s Helpline: Call 1-800-950-NAMI (1-800-950-6264).
- Call the 988 hotline
- The Trevor Project: Call 1-866-488-7386.
Help Your Child Build Resilience and Emotional Strength with Therapy for Children in South Jersey
At DBT of South Jersey, we understand how overwhelming it can be to see your child struggle with big emotions and distress. Our specialized therapists provide the support and skills children need to manage tough feelings with confidence. Reach out today to learn how we can help your child thrive with therapy for children in South Jersey. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
- Contact us to book a free consultation with our intake team
- Meet with one of our skilled child therapists
- Start seeing your child build resilience and emotional strength!
Additional Services Offered at DBT of South Jersey
At DBT of South Jersey, we offer more than just therapy for children — we create a nurturing space where kids can develop resilience and strengthen their ability to handle tough emotions. We recognize that every family is unique, so our care extends beyond just the child to support the entire family system. With offices in Voorhees and Moorestown, we provide trauma-informed care, support for couples and the LGBTQIA community, OCD treatment, and holistic healing options. Explore our blog for valuable insights, tools, and guidance on therapy for children and teens.
