Trauma in childhood can have a lasting impact on a child’s emotional, psychological, and social development. The results of trauma can leave children feeling unsafe, dysregulated, and disconnected from others. What’s important for children and their families to know is that they’re not alone. That their child can get the support they need to help them heal. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), used in therapy for children, is an evidence-based therapeutic treatment method that promotes a compassionate and skills-based model that helps children not only survive trauma but also heal and thrive.
Understanding Trauma in Children
Before diving into how DBT helps, it’s important to understand what trauma could look like in children. Childhood trauma can manifest in many ways, including:
- Emotional dysregulation (extreme mood swings, meltdowns)
- Difficulty trusting others
- Poor self-esteem or self-worth
- Trouble with attention or school performance
- Sleep disturbances or nightmares
- Avoidance or withdrawal
- Risky behaviors in older children or adolescents
Trauma disrupts a child’s sense of safety and their ability to regulate emotions and navigate relationships. If left untreated, these wounds can carry into adulthood, affecting mental health, relationships, and overall functioning.
What Is DBT?
Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a form of cognitive-behavioral therapy developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan. DBT helps treat various emotional and behavioral issues across different age groups, including children and teens.
At its core, DBT focuses on building skills in four main areas:
- Mindfulness – Staying present, observing, and being aware in the moment.
- Distress Tolerance – Managing crises and difficult emotions without making things worse.
- Emotion Regulation – Understanding and managing intense emotions more effectively.
- Interpersonal Effectiveness – Building healthy relationships, assertive communication, and building up our self-respect.
DBT also embraces the concept of dialectics, which is the idea that two opposing truths can both be valid. For example, “I’m doing the best I can” and “I need to do better” can both be true. This balance between acceptance and change is crucial when helping children navigate the confusing aftermath of trauma.
Why DBT Works for Traumatized Children
DBT therapy provides tools and principles that help support children in their recovery from traumatic experiences. Here’s how:
1. Building a Sense of Safety
Trauma shatters a child’s sense of safety, both in the world and within themselves. DBT provides structure, consistency, and clear skills that help rebuild that safety. Through regular sessions and the use of skills training, children learn tools they can rely on during emotional storms.
In DBT, child therapists validate the child’s experience and work to create a safe space. At the same time, they gently guide the child toward making positive changes. This approach builds trust and fosters a supportive environment where the child feels seen, heard, and cared for.
2. Teaching Emotional Literacy
Many children who have experienced trauma may struggle with finding the words or awareness to explain how they feel. They might lash out, shut down, or act out because they simply don’t know what’s going on inside. DBT helps them name, understand, and normalize their emotions.
The Emotion Regulation module teaches kids to recognize what they’re feeling, what triggered it, and what they can do about it. Learning to identify emotions like fear, shame, anger, or sadness and knowing they are manageable can be incredibly empowering for a child who’s used to feeling overwhelmed or misunderstood.
3. Reducing Self-Destructive or Risky Behaviors
Older children and teens who have experienced trauma might engage in risky or self-destructive behaviors such as self-harm, substance use, disordered eating, or reckless behavior as a way to cope. DBT’s Distress Tolerance skills offer healthier alternatives. Children learn techniques like:
- TIPP (Temperature, Intense Exercise, Paced Breathing, Paired Muscle Relaxation)
- Distraction and self-soothing strategies
- Radical acceptance of things they can’t control
These tools help children ride the wave of emotional pain without turning to harmful or impulsive behaviors.
4. Empowering Relationships Through Interpersonal Effectiveness
Trauma, especially interpersonal trauma like abuse or neglect, can deeply damage a child’s ability to trust or connect with others. DBT’s Interpersonal Effectiveness module helps children learn:
- How to ask for what they need in a respectful way.
- How to set healthy boundaries.
- How to say no without guilt.
- How to maintain self-respect during conflicts.
This is especially important for children who may have grown up in environments where their needs were ignored or punished.
5. Mindfulness: A Gentle Path to the Present Moment
Mindfulness teaches children to pay attention to the here and now. This can be life-changing for a trauma survivor.
Mindfulness exercises can be playful and child-friendly, such as:
- Using senses to explore a favorite snack.
- Belly breathing.
- Going for a walk in nature and taking in the sounds, sights, and smells.
- Noticing five things they see, four things they hear, three things they can touch, two things they smell, one thing they taste.
These grounding techniques help children develop the ability to pause, reflect, and respond rather than react.
6. Validation: Healing Through Being Heard
A key part of DBT is validation, which is acknowledging that a child’s thoughts, emotions, and behaviors make sense in the context of their experiences. For trauma survivors, who may have been ignored or punished for expressing pain, validation is a form of healing in itself.
Therapists use validation to let children know that their feelings are real and that they make sense. This builds self-worth and trust, which helps to strengthen the therapeutic relationship.
7. Parental and Family Involvement
DBT for Children often involves parent coaching or family therapy. Parents learn the same DBT skills their children are learning, so they can model and reinforce healthy emotional behaviors at home.
Families who participate in DBT often report improved communication, reduced conflict, and a stronger emotional connection. All of which are protective factors against future trauma-related struggles.
DBT for Younger Children
DBT has also been adapted for children as young as 6 or 7. This version is called DBT-C (Dialectical Behavior Therapy for Children).
DBT-C includes:
- Age-appropriate language and visuals
- Play-based and experiential activities
- More involvement from parents or caregivers
- Focus on validating emotions and teaching basic regulation skills
Therapists might use stories, games, crafts, or cartoons to teach concepts like “Wise Mind” or “Opposite Action.” For example, a child afraid of going to school might learn how to use the opposite action (facing the fear head-on) with the help of a superhero-themed workbook.
Hope and Healing Are Possible
Children are resilient. With the right tools and support, they can heal from even the most painful experiences. DBT at DBT of South Jersey provides a roadmap for emotional regulation, healthy relationships, and self-empowerment, all within a compassionate, validating framework.
For parents, educators, and therapists supporting traumatized children, DBT offers hope. It teaches children that while they can’t change the past. They can learn to cope, connect, and create a meaningful future.
Help Your Child Heal and Grow with Compassionate Support Through Therapy for Children in South Jersey
If your child is struggling with the effects of trauma, they don’t have to face it alone. At DBT of South Jersey, we provide specialized therapy for children in South Jersey to help them feel safe, supported, and empowered to heal. Reach out today to learn how our team can support your child’s journey toward resilience and emotional well-being. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
- Contact us to book a free consultation with our intake team
- Meet with one of our skilled child therapists
- Start seeing your child heal!
Additional Services Offered at DBT of South Jersey
At DBT of South Jersey, in addition to offering therapy for children where kids can heal from their trauma in healthy ways, we understand that each family has its own dynamics, which is why we take a holistic approach that includes support for parents and caregivers as well. With locations in Moorestown and Voorhees, our services include trauma-informed therapy, OCD treatment, couples and family therapy, and integrative healing methods. Visit our blog to discover helpful tips, resources, and insights on therapy for children and adolescents.
Resources for Parents and Professionals
- Books:
- “DBT Skills Manual for Children and Adolescents” by Rathus, Miller, and Linehan
- “Don’t Let Your Emotions Run Your Life for Kids” by Jennifer J. Solin and Christina L. Kress
- Websites:
